Honey Bunny, this reminds me of you

I have had a very weird phrase stuck in my head the past few days that I keep forgetting to google, "Ving Rhames". Now after finally remembering to google it, I discover he's the big boss man in Pulp Fiction. I watched and read the wiki on Pulp Fiction a few weeks ago.

It always fascinated me how I have random words of which I cannot remember the source of bouncing about my head. The last time I remember something as weird as this happening is thinking of the word "Spiewak" constantly. At first I thought it was some sort of creature/machine from Star Wars and then I googled it to realise it was the brand of some super warm outdoors jacket I had been looking at weeks earlier.

This reminds me of a thing Cheam said today about how whenever he boards planes, he still listens to the safety procedures and reads the little safety brochure. This is because the mind often stores information subconsciously and as long as it is relatively fresh in the mind it is already committed to memory - ready to be drawn upon when it is needed as long as it is within a short duration of the reading.

My exams in LSE begin on Monday. I don't think I have ever been so simultaneously stressed and frustrated with my exams before - frustrated because I feel like all I do is never enough and there are still so many unknowns unlike when we were spoonfed in school. While I did do research on my own for Paper 3 History by reading John Fairbank, it is like a little drop in the very large ocean that studying for university entails. In that sense, it is far more stressful for me because there are so many unknowns.

However at the same time, I know I have done enough work for History to walk off with 2:1s. Reflecting on everything academic this school year and recognising my aim for a 1 will not come true, I think I will walk away this year at least knowing what to do and what not to do next year - and think of it as a step to getting my 1s next year.

So, all I can do now is sip my tea, look forward to getting this damn chore over with and to try again next year. No point stressing out myself anyway.

Now, if only I can maintain this calm and accepting frame of mind in 48 hours.