HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Fanfiction.net is so amusing :D

I was complaining about someone who paired up Tom Riddle (<3) and Harry Potter

Inspired by what transpired yesterday I decided to go look for Hagrid romance fics.

Here are the true gems:
3. Found by Fishified reviews
My name is Remus Lupin, I’m a homosexual werewolf, and this is my story. ::Theme 67::

6. In the name of Love and Bad Fanfics by Steal reviews
Dobby gets raped and turns up at Hagrids doorstep. A beautiful love ensues.. well, not really. It's actually quite scary. Then they get married. Then Dobby nearly dies.. next: Dobby realises that Hagrid is a man.

17. Big Things in Little Places by Araminta Melliflua reviews
A lonely half-giant longs for love...a butterbeer addicted house-elf seeks someone to understand her woes...wrongness ensues. Watch out for scary innuendo.

20. From the Flower by misted-oracle reviews
Neville's accident in the greenhouse leads to much more. Slash: NevilleHagrid

23. Their Eternal Embrace by CaptainBianca reviews
Hagird and Dobby spend an evening together and their fierce bottled emotions are released.

Gosh. Talk about freaks inheriting the earth, nevermind the meek!

On the upside, not Hagrid/Pansy ones yet :D

edit: OH MY GOODNESS!

I was searching for FILCH fics (under romance) and I merrily concluded that there were none because i pressed the wrong button and instead search romance between Snape and Filch -.-

Well, at least there were none.

4. Misunderstood by ohso-oblivious reviews
Harry thinks Filch's just misunderstood. HF. PG13 for language.

9. Umbridge and Filch: A Strange Romance by thehpgang reviews
Filch and Umbridge: a strange yet perfect match. By Dobby. (talk about ALIEN and SPAWN)

11. Secret Affairs of the Janitor by whereiswaldo reviews
The quite disturbing relationship between Hogwarts' Janitor and Percy Weasley. Those with weak constitutions may want to leave the building.

13. To Love a Hooded Snake by Brick Retarded Weatherman reviews
The worst most horrible piece of fanfiction you will ever read. Filch and Voldemort. Slash..obviously. Nothing graphic. Read if you want a few terrible, guilty laughs. One-Shot. Complete. (noooo, not Tom Riddle!)

21. Love Gone to the Cats by The Cleric 007 reviews
A long time ago, in a galaxy not that far away (the Harry Potter world, in fact), Mrs. Norris was a young, beautiful and unhappy wife, and Argus Filch was her handsome, young gardener. Written for the Hogwarts FQF. ONE-SHOT

27. Nocturnal Affair by Kitzaku reviews
[Lee Jordan/Filch] Filch is on his nightly rounds when he runs into Lee.

And here's a most novel one -.-

2. Oxygen by hiddensoullover reviews
[OneShot Prequel to 'If Only'] Pansy and Hermione get trapped in Trelawney's closet on day and discover some of the benefits of the lack of air...AND schoolmates! WARNING: FEMSLASH! ShojoAi!

I give up on the world.

Hahahaha. How fun :D Today my grandparents came back from Ipoh and when my dad called to ask my grandma when they'd reach Singapore (they were taking coach) she said that only she was coming back, not my grandpa (she was playing a prank).

So my dad relayed the message to my maid and she cooked the right amount of food for 7 people (my uncle's maid was here too). When my grandpa stepped out of the car, I was shocked, but not as shocked as my maid when she realised that there wasn't enough food. In the end my grandma ate bee hoon instant mee because she was the one who made everything messed up. How fun (:

Ianthe wants an entry: she shall get an entry! Once upon a time there was a girl named Ianthe. She lived on an island. On the same island lived a boy named Ian. One day Ian and Ianthe met and they got married and had Ian the II and Ianthe II.

Also: do you want to go out with Steph and me on Thursday since you're so bored? We're going to watch HP4 (yay, again).

Ay, poor Steph probably ain't coming online for some time :( Go see her 2nd entry from the links at the sidebar. There goes the number #1 tagger on my tagboard. Salut dear Steph!

Sigh, I'm going nuts at home. I'm still so pissed that I can't install DirectX 9.0c for some reason so I can play The Sims. For some reason when my dad reinstalled everything on the com with the Windows Service Pack 2 bundled up with the XP, it blocked out any attempts to install the dratted DirectX and the one on my system is DirectX9.0b. Okay, for some reason I sounds like a geek now obsessing over some techie thing. Anyway, back to my main problem: I'm going crazt at home!

I've barely started on my homework (only doing a small bit of E Math [surprise surprise!] on Monday because I was THAT bored) and can hardly find the motivation to plow through oodles and oodles of equations (both mathamatical and chemical), facts and information. Sigh.

On the upside, over the weekend my dad brought a pressure gun home so I could clean the backwall of my garden (yeah, that bored too). It was so fun! Anytime I saw a bug jumping on the wall, I'd stop my cleaning and point the gun at it. I think I killed 3 bugs that way. It was super dirty with flecks of old paint, mould, moss and dirt flying all over the place. The gun was so powerful that it even blew off little chunks of the wall too >.<>

Now i'm waiting for my dad to buy paint to I can re-paint the wall (:

I really want to go out next week to do some shopping for christmas and maybe even a movie, anyone up for it? I don't want to spend another week cooped up at home eating mashed potatoes day after day (anyway, I ran out of Italian Salad Dressing). And if anyone has a really good/silly storyline, please tell me! I want to write something but can't find any inspiration at all, and you'll get the credit ;)

Arrrrrgh. My mind feels totally fried. With the guide camp and thinking about for to resolve A (see below post)'s problems and no easy reading in sight I just feel so serious. Who ever knew that Mein Kampf would be like, the most boring book ever written by a madman?

I can only manage 2 pages before my mind zonks out and after that I still have Dostovesky's Crime and Punishment and Tolstoy's War and Peace which is thicker than a grown man's arm. Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

And no one reads this blog anyway, I might as well just talk to myself! HAHAHAHAHAHA.

Well, not that loony yet. Unlike NIL NAI.

Man, I need a new idea for a funny story and Jeremy hasn't done anything stupid for a long time for me to make fun of him. Sigh.

Yay, I finally saw HP4: The Goblet of Fire. Now I can't wait for Sunday's HP2: The Chamber of Secrets.

Robert Pattinson is pretty cute, but I still like Christian Coulson more (:

Ay, last night really worried me. A certain someone (let's call her A) was acting strangely after the movie. Everyone was going to Pizza Hut @ Centerpoint and we were about to cross the road when she suddenly muttered something about having to meeting someone and slipped away after my offer to accompany her as refused.

Naturally I was suspicious and to my dismay I noticed that everyone else had cross the road and had gone on ahead (It was a big group). I decided to tail her.

It wasn't pretty hard though there were many times I was almost spotted and when I almost lost her in the crowd. Thank goodness I'm so skinny and I'm female, or else I would have been spotted or I would have been arrested/stopped by some police officer/security guard on the premise of being a terrorist/thief.

After follwing her all the way to paragon and heeren, I lost her at HMV because I didn't dare go inside the store, lest I get spotted so I stood outside when she disappeared behind a pillar for a suspiciously long time when I decided to go inside and investigate and she had really disappeared! Ay.

So I gave up and went off to centerpoint. Well, nothing about a girl trying to kill herself in the papers right? Still, it was really very freaky and quite an expierence.

Nevermind, I have Christian to keep me sane (:

And this is what it all degenerates to: from a madman to a madman.

In case you're wondering what I mean, I just started reading Mien Kampf by Adolf Hitler. The first few pages alone are enough to bring home the message: he's a madman.

Not for his views mind you, but his style of writing. It's so mind bogglingly bad (even through it's been transalated from german to english) that I have to read one paragraph over and over till I can understand it. I've barely gone past the 12th page and my mind is going nuts over his stlye of prose. Not to mention the fact that he subtly slips in his bits of political nonsense in between the already confusing lines.

Example: 'It was at this time that the first ideals* took shape in my breast. All my playing about in the open, the long walk to school, and particularly my association with 'husky' boys**, which sometimes caused my mother bitter anguish, made me the very opposite of a stay-at-home***.'

In * it mentions his 'ideals'. However the paragraph before has nothing to do with Hitler himself, instead it is writing about his father like a narrator. The sudden change of styles is most unusual, uncalled for and simply a case of a bad writer. The paragraph also does not mention what his 'ideals' are (though i'm sure we all know what HE thinks of jews). The vague reference to 'time' also does not help as the year, the date was not given and the paragraph before instead harped on a 56 year old civil sevrant buying a farm (his dad).

** is phrased in such a way that I don't understand the connection at all and the kicker is when 'husky' boys comes in. Does it refer to hairy (siberian husky dogs) boys, hungarian (though they're called 'hunky' boys or some other thing that goes up there with Nazi moon bases in 1942? (see below posts)

*** what the hell is a 'opposite of a stay-at-home'? stay at home what? stay at home education (home schooling), stay at home father/mother, stay at home monkey, stay at home what? And what's the opposite of a stay at home (example:) mother? A stay at home father? Huh?!?!?!

And that's just the beginning man. Mein Kampf on Mel's part for trying to read Mein Kampf by Adolf Hitler -.-

At least the 2nd madman is a little less tedious to read about and understand, not to mention the fact that he's played by 2 totally gorgeous men, Ralph Fiennes and Christian Coulson (: ahhhh. Can't wait to watch the HP movie!

And by the way, Mein Kampf means My Struggle in german.

Ah, my old bones ache.

Well, 15 year old bones that is. Today the GB had their campfire and Jamie, Grace, Yihui (Huang), Vanessa (Tan), Jacqueline (kaijuuthealmighty -.-) and me went to help them out (:

It was quite disasterous on hindsight, but it was our first time doing a campfire (I can't imagine having to do it three more times!) so I guess it went pretty alright for a bunch of girls who had close to zero expierence with campfires (though Jacqueline and me had our outdoor cooking training).

The fire started to go out about 25 minutes before the actual ending of the campfire and we all started to panic, employing different devices like soaking the firewood in kerosene before adding it to the fire, but this quickly gave way to me just throwing liquid kerosene on the fire just to keep it alive.

And the weird part was when the campfire was over, we couldn't put out the flames! *()#$)($ stupid fire.

My hands still smell like kerosene. Yuk.

Do you guys get pop up spam when you visit my blog? After my dad re-did the whole com, everytime I visit my blog I always get these annoying pop ups (those they're mostly blocked).

Tell me if you do get them, pop ups that is.

GRRRRR. I hate using e-mait, especially when I have to send it to people with strange/weird spelling e-mails like Jacqueline's one -.-

First I typed her e-mail as kajuuthealmighty@yahoo.com.sg

It didn't send, naturally.

Then I realised the e-mail I sent out had no attachment, which was the main purpose of me sending the e-mail in the first place!

So I had to retype everyone's e-mail again (because for some reason the MSN group I created didn't turn up under 'Groups') and this time I remembered to attach the stupid document, but this time I typed kaijuuthealmighty@hotmail.com. Then the stupid postmaster nonsense sent yet another e-mail telling me the e-mail was invaild. This time I gave up and just forwarded the whole thing, postmaster nonsense and all to her proper e-mail (which got through).

Having enough of that nonsense, I decided to create a Group inside Hotmail inself to save myself any grief next time around. My contacts had been accumulating and stagnating for dunno how long and I got momentarily distracted trying to delete some THING's e-mail (which wouldn't delete, kept on getting a pop-up that said there was an error).

Finally giving up deleting the e-mail, I decided to move on and create a group, unfortunately it suddenly decided to recognize Guides Planning Committe and after getting yet another retarded pop up saying there was an error, I changed the name to Guides Camp Planning Committee (or something like that) and then I saw this page -.-

In case you can't see, the first line under the MSN logo reads: Page not found.

The words in red go: GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRx100

You get the idea.

Now I have NO e-mail group, still have that THING's e-mail and I'm (a little? hahaha, right.) miffed. Stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid *$#()$*)(@*

Happy Birthday Ange & Steph!

Congratulations for surviving:
- One year of GK and ROng
- Numerous illness in the past 15 years
- One lame/perverted 'Ding Dong Song'
- One year of chensie and soo (vomit blood)
- You-know-what dustbin investigations
- Canteen food for 9 years
- A horrific (but still fun) PW last year
- And 2 years of a retarded and fantastic friendship with Ianthe and me!

Happy Birthday 2005!

sometimes i feel like the lonliest person on earth, a victim of my own standards and the unholy trinity.

and they wondered what happened to me on the last day of school.

Ah fine, since I got 'tagged' by Stephanie:

"Rules of the game: Post 5 Weird and Random facts about yourself, then at the end list the names of 5 people who are next in line to do this. Don't forget to leave a comment that says "You are tagged" in their blog and tell them to read yours."

And I shall be defiant and not 'tag' anyone, hah!

1. I get super annoyed at the way Singaporeans speak mandarin, as if they 'wanna die lieddat', without soul, without inflection and without effort. I am not be a hypocrite here because even though my own mandarin vocabulary is very sparse, I speak it with feeling and expression (interpret that yourself) which is probably the only reason I passed by Chinese Oral by 1 mark.

2. I like the thought of 'broken' people, or females to be more specific. Examples are: Tess Durbeyfield (of Tess of the D'Urbervilles by Thomas Hardy), Maiev Shadowsong of Warcraft III: Frozen Throne, O Ren Ishii of Kill Bill, The Bride aka Beatrix Kiddo of Kill Bill. I also like the idea of assassins.

3. I like smooth, jazzy or piano tunes. Either that or sad music.

4. I've been keeping a personal diary since I was 11, started on the 2nd of December Sunday 2001. The first entry has a line that goes:

I HATE Osama (picture of a dustbin) Laden, oh screw him! He ruined my trip to America!

My diary has also travelled to Vancouver and Malaysia (the 2nd one) with me on my trips. I am now looking for one to replace the 2nd one, which is rapidly running out of pages.

5. When I am bored and have nothing to do online, I look for Sims 2 downloads.

And that's that.

This post may be offensive to believers of Nazi Mysticism. If you are easily offended please leave now. The owner of the blog shall bear no responsibility for any rage, insanity that may occur.

-----

Wow. Two warnings in two blog posts.

This one is a little uncalled for since I doubt anyone who believes in Nazi Mysticism would ever come to this blog, but hey, one never knows.

I was surfing about wiki (very useful for bored people) when I chanced upon this page.

The first few lines of the article instantly had me chuckling away. Pigs do fly eh?

Other related modern theories involve Hitler having escaped to the Antarctic, where he joined with a subterranean dinosauroid master race, with whom he now travels inside UFOs underground, generally beneath the South Pole or throughout the center of the hollow earth, but sometimes to a Nazi moon base as well.

It has been speculated by many esoteric Hitlerists and conspiracy theorists that study Nazi mysticism and the events that unfolded in Worl War II that the Germans landed on the moon as early as 1942.

In case you were wondering what I was doing at such a page, I was looking at an article of Esotericism.

Other artices worth a look are:
List of Books that have been banned across the years in various areas and List of worst movies ever (self explanatory)

Funnily enough, Channel 5 seems to posses alot of 'worst movies ever' in their stable of movies.

Another one worth a look is the IMDB's 100 worst list, not as entertaining with the plots located through links, though some of the titles are no less funny.

Have fun (: