Row Row Row Your Boat

I never listened to much metal until I became a housewife. I liked Linkin Park, and some of Limp Bizkit's music, but nu-metal was as much exposure I got as a 2000s teen growing up in Singapore. I had heard of bands like Metallica of course, but never heard any of their music until I deliberately went looking for 'Enter Sandman' because I heard American troops were using it to torture prisoners of war in Abu Gharib and other. That and 'Highway to Hell' by AC/DC. In reflection this is actually pretty funny (not for the prisoners of course, who had never heard such music before and were being blasted by this seemingly hellistic, satanic sounds 24/7 as a form of mental torture) because those are actually very mainstream metal songs and not at all controversial. Those songs, and those bands, are miles away from actual Black Metal or Satanic Metal. I remember being so apprehensive to even listen to Enter Sandman and Highway to Hell then, convinced my christian soul was at stake (evidently my intellectual curiosity won out). But thanks to Limewire, I did. This was probably 2004? And I was 14 years old. 

Anyway when we moved to StL, my favourite music station was KLOU 103.3 and they specialised in '80s and '90s rock. From that station I ended up being exposed to a lot of new music, like ZZ Top, and occasionally they'd play Rage Against the Machine and System of a Down. Soon, those two bands entered my regular rotation of music. They were the best to listen to when doing mindless numbing tasks, like folding endless loads of laundry. And then I had M, and went though another bout of post-partum depression, and as I'd lay in bed feeling despair all I could think of was the lyrics of Chop Suey. Still Rage and System were very much considered not regular 'metal'. I tried listening to metal songs and bands, but nothing resonated. I was not a fan of the guttural incoherent screaming sounds. Somewhere around this time I heard about a rising band named Ghost, and even wanted to go to their concert in StL in Aug 2023, but we were ultimately unable to make the timing work.

From then to now, I also heard about a band called Amon Amarth and enjoyed their whole Viking Metal schtick, but also couldn't get behind the guttural vocals. I still played Put Your Back Into the Oar though, and one time E asked me what the song was, and I said it was basically 'Row Row Row Your Boat', and she said she liked the song after, lol. I also subscribed to Napalm Records on YouTube, and enjoyed the occasional metal songs from all over (Maori Metal anyone?). And Ghost of course, over the past 2 years, exploded into somewhat mainstream consciousness. Twice I have seen people wearing Ghost merch out. 

One of these times, the woman wearing the Ghost hoodie, turned out to be really chatty. I ended up having a great conversation with her, and it turned out she was once a DJ for a metal radio station in NJ, so she was very knowledgeable about metal. She gave me a whole slew of recommendations, and I went home and started listening to some of them. Somehow this made YouTube decide to give me recommendations, and they turned out to be full concert length videos of Behemoth and Batushka (now Patriakh) - two Polish Black Metal Bands. And somehow as I sat there listening and knitting, something stuck. And it was maybe a day or two later that I found out that my grandfather had died, and suddenly that misery and sadness I felt made their Black Metal songs feel comforting. It was all I felt like listening to. And I guess this is where I at with my metal listening journey, which oddly developed not when I was an angsty teen, but as a full fledged (debatable of course) adult with children.

-----

Yesterday I went to a trial rowing class. Years ago, the ex I dated in LSE, was co-captain or something of the rowing club. They even did some '24h' row thing with a machine on Houghton Street before to raise money, but I don't recall going to see it, lol. I was a pretty shit girlfriend. But anyway I think that was the first time I really became aware of a rowing exercise machine. It looked cool, but I didn't understand how to use it.

Of course over the years I have seem numerous rowing machines in gyms, but never once used them. I have tugged on the handles before, but never dared to use it. Also the first tug of the handle seemed so tough and intimidating, which was also another deterrent. Around StL too, there were quite a few Row Houses, which I figured was like Peloton but with rowing machines. I thought the name was pretty clever, but didn't think anything else beyond that because I had no time or energy to exercise or take care of myself. 

Then of course we moved to NJ, and lo and behold, there is Row House nearby. I thought about going for a trial class there, but then Jon warmed me that I was so out of shape, I was liable to give myself a heart attack. So instead I aimed lower (OR DID I?) and started doing yoga regularly in Summer 2024. With the initial trial period I went to yoga twice a week, but later slowed to once a week. Still almost every yoga class made me feel like my butt was kicked. That felt like enough exercise for now, and so I was pretty content. 

For the New Orleans trip however, I had a hell of a time packing, as mentioned before. I was not happy with my body, and decided I should step up my game. After looking around the area (and knowing I was not likely to stick to anything that would be a pain to get to), I ended up back at Row House. So I signed up for a trial class and went yesterday, and I really enjoyed it. I liked the motion of the rowing machine, which of course took some time for me to learn, but somehow snapped into place when then lights were turned off. All the yoga I did helped too, because afterwards I was not collapsing in agony. I felt fine all day yesterday too (punishing allergies aside), and woke up only 1/10 in muscular aches today too. What I didn't like was all the loud music, so I feel like I need to bring earplugs next time. Also, I felt the experience could have been improved if they blasted metal music instead. It would have been awesome to row listening to metal Row Row Row Your Boat - Put Your Back Into The Oar by Amon Amarth.

Sparks Nice Memories

Yesterday after neglecting my wardrobe for months, I finally got around to cleaning it and sorting it out. I was tired of everything being in a self-created jumble, and failing to find particular items of clothing that I knew were in the mess somehow. That and overstuffed drawers that wouldn't close. Part of it was months of neglect and I-don't-know-what-to-do-with-this finally coming to a head when I had to pack for New Orleans, and was having a hell of a time finding a dress that was both weather and occasion appropriate for 'smart casual' restaurants at night.

Anyway I spent at least 2h+ sorting things out and rearranging things, and I still have more to do because I had to leave to go pick up E, and then later cook dinner. While I was doing this I decided to dedicate a shelf to clothes that 'give me special feelings but that I am realistically not going to wear for reasons'. The first things that ended up in this shelf were my renaissance fair stuff: the polyester faux medieval blue overdress and chemise, the viking overdress that I needed to re-fit, two thick chemises of cotton and linen that are heavy and long that IDK what to do with. The next were two vintage-y style dresses that I love, and can't fit into comfortably. Finally the last were outright sentimental items: the white collared dress shirt with cuff links still attached that I wore for my LSE graduation, the green silk blouse I wore for my first conference presentation in Vancouver, a grey t-shirt from the Utah National Parks when I visited them with my parents after graduating from my Masters in 2016, and a grey t-shirt from Main Streets Books in St. Charles that I remember wearing one day while running into the elevator at Mercy Hospital when I was pregnant with M, and another occupant saying, "St. Charles eh?"

There are other sentimental items of clothing around of course, but like I said, I still have more sorting and cleaning to do. 

New Orleans Spring Break

For Spring Break this year we visited New Orleans. Years ago when I first moved to the US for my studies, New Orleans was one of the places I wanted to visit most. Then life happened, and now some 10 and a half years after moving to the US, I finally got the chance to visit, which was nice. Because Jon had studied there, I pretty much left all of the trip planning to him, exempting 2 places I wanted to visit. I even somehow manage to push the responsibility of packing for the trip to him, though in retrospect I regretted that because he somehow under-packed M's clothes, and she ran out half way. In the end he had to handwash and attempt to dry her clothes in the hotel room. For future reference the way to pack for kids is this: days of trip x 1.5 items of clothing. Also for some reason we always never have enough moisturizer. And the kids are always cold.

Top 3 Things 

1. The Food - Jon had done his research and booked some really nice restaurants for us to eat at. At the same time I really enjoyed getting to try Cajun and Creole cuisine, plus just eating all the seafood in general. I loved having cheesy grits with my food, nibbling on beignets (which reminded me of ham chim peng), and was happy I got to have a breakfast of biscuits and gravy. E always enjoyed eating Red Beans and Rice, which of course made us happy too. 

2. The Kids - E was very excited about the trip. For some reason she was really looking forward to the plane ride there. It was nice seeing them excited about seeing the different and new sights, and watching them play. It was also enjoyable having snowballs with them, and visiting the Children's Museum.

3. Shopping - NOLA has a fair amount of unique shops, beyond the tourist crap (which of course we partook of too), and other mass produced junk. I actually bought quite a few pairs of earrings for reasonable prices in and around the French Market area. One of the places I really wanted to visit was also Yvonne LaFleur, a women's clothing store in the Garden District. I had seem videos of the store, and it seemed like a lovely old school women's store, with a remarkable owner to boot. Sure enough, while I was looking around the store, Ms. Yvonne LaFleur appeared and even chatted to E and I for a while. I really liked looking around the store and taking pictures with E. If only we didn't have a mortgage to pay, or else I'd have bought more from there. 

Bonus item: The scenery/architecture.

I really liked seeing the architecture of the houses around New Orleans. Of course there was the French Quarter itself, but I also liked the shotguns and double shotgun houses that were all over. There were those painted in bright eye catching colours, there were those decorated with permanent Mardi Gras beads, and those with just pretty porch furniture. I also appreciated how during the evenings you could see people actually sitting on their porches just chilling out. It really added to the vibe of New Orleans being 'The Big Easy' to just see people hanging out and relaxing.

Worst 3 Things

1. The Food - I hated dealing with the kids during every meal time. M was particularly difficult because she is a picky eater anyway. Travelling meant even more foreign items, and us being too tired to deal with her nonsense. She basically didn't eat an entire vegetable or fruit during her entire time in New Orleans. She also largely survived on the bread that was given as an appetizer when we ate at nicer places. The top meal highlight for the kids was when right before we went to the airport to fly back to NJ, we went to a McDonalds. That that McDonalds happened to have a play place too was icing on the cake. Best meal ever for kids: chicken mcnuggets      -___________-"

2. The Kids - OH MY GOD THEY CAN BE SO ANNOYING. Also they complain allllllllll the timeeeeee. Too hot too cold too tired too sun-in-my-eyes-Mummy. They definitely made the trip unpleasant and tiring several times. At one point on our sole planation visit (I would have wanted to see more ordinarily, but we were cognizant of the kids) to Laura Plantation, I had to dip out for 1/3 of the guided tour because M kept complaining she was hungry, so I had to bring her to the Gift Shop to buy a $2 pack of peanut butter crackers for her to eat (to her credit she did finish the entire packet of 6 crackers). I also don't remember exactly what happened but after our morning visiting a section of the French Quarter on our first full day there, the kids left me so drained I basically crashed out and napped for 2h back at the hotel afterwards. According to Jon I snored quite a bit too, so I really must have been wiped. 

3. The Hotel Room - We had a hotel room at a Fairfield Inn in Metairie, just outside New Orleans proper. It was decently priced, had a hotel pool, and included breakfast, which were all great. What wasn't great was how quickly the kids managed to trash the hotel room, and there were no places to put things like towels. The kids and Jon also went swimming twice (I went once) and there was no place to put their slopping wet things and Jon just piled them in the middle of the bathroom. Also for some reason housekeeping only came once during our 4 night stay there. I very soon hated being in the room because of how it made me feel, even though I was so tired and just wanted to lie down.

-----

On Friday after having a rushed McDonalds lunch, because we wanted to have ample time at the airport, we found out that our flight to Newark would be delayed by 2h 15mins. We ended up staying at the McDonalds for longer so the kids to play at the play place. Then even after we passed security, we waited at an empty gate so the kids could run around without disturbing anyone else. By the time we landed at Newark, it was 10:30pm, we got our car around 11pm and ended up picking up McDonalds again for a late night supper since it was around the corner from our long-term parking lot. We reached home at 12 midnight, and obviously the kids had fallen asleep on the way home. Shower time for the kids that night (morning?) was obviously very traumatic with a lot of screaming because they were tired and didn't want to shower (of course). I myself went to bed around 1:30am because I was feeling keyed up, and Jon probably slept around 2am after running a load of laundry. 

That was Saturday morning. We then stuck around enough to do some chores, before heading out for a quick lunch and then going to church for their Easter community event at 1pm, so the girls could enjoy an Easter Egg Hunt. Then we drove to Long Island to visit my in-laws. Sunday morning we all went to Easter Mass together (I saw half of it because of course M got bored and noisy so I brought her outside), then we had lunch and started the drive back to NJ sans M (leaving her in Long Island for the week, because Jon will be away in Atlanta for a conference from Weds to Fri). Once back in NJ, I did non-stop chores all the way until about 6pm, where I got to play my much missed KCD2 for about an hour before going to bed early too.

It's Monday now and I managed to go to yoga today. I really feel the strain from not having exercised in a while. Between the trip and M falling sick often recently, I haven't been able to exercise as often as I'd have liked. I also did grocery shopping for the week, and by the time I got home it was around 12:15pm. I sat down to write after eating lunch, and so far it's taken me about an hour of straight typing and thinking to write all of this so far. The rest of my day is equally busy (E has a pediatrician visit, homework), so I should stop dawdling and get on with the rest of my chores now.

Anthony

Both E and M have an Anthony in their respective classes this year. And for some reason, the name appears to be hard for children to pronounce. I only realised this after some checking, because for the longest time the girls were telling me about a child in their class, and called them by funny sounding names, and I chalked it up to modern newfangled naming practices. For months, E would tell me about a nice boy in her class that she played with sometimes called Infanny (In-fe-ni). I thought that was a really weird name for a boy, but wondered if it was some sort of obscure Catholic saint. Then one day months later, it occured to me to ask her how Infanny's name was spelled, and she said A N T H... and I was all WTF. Her attempt at pronouncing his name just blew my mind. But I thought it was maybe an E thing.

Then one day I was walking M into her classroom of other 2 to 3 year olds, when she saw a classmate and got really excited. She kept saying Effie! Effie! In a very happy tone, Not really thinking much about it but also not quite believing M, I said to the boy, who was also with his Mom, Hi Effie, if that is even your name. And the Mom said Hi back on behalf of the boy, and clarified his name was Anthony. And I was left thinking, WTF, again???

Anyway next week is Spring Break, and we will be going to New Orleans for a holiday. It's the first time Jon has been back since he graduated, and it will be my first time visiting. New Orleans was always one of the places I wanted to visit when I first moved to the US, and somehow because of time and money, never got around to visiting. Of course it will be a very different experience visiting with kids versus before I had kids (not that I was a big drinker and partier before, but at least my bedtime wasn't 10pm), but it should be enjoyable nonetheless. And in a funny stroke of coincidence, we will also visit Jon's friend, Anthony, who moved back there to work after a spell doing his training in NYC. I wonder if the girls will attempt to pronounce Uncle Anthony's name, or just not call his name at all. Either way, it will be nice to see him and his husband, Jacob. The last time I saw them was right before I left NYC to go back to Singapore in preparation for E's birth in 2019, so it has been several years. Between COVID and kids, time has really passed quickly.