Last night I sat in front of the computer, cross stitching, while watching a Facebook live stream of the protests in downtown St. Louis. I watched from the beginning of the confrontation, when the protesters first reached the city police HQ on Olive, to the police coming out in riot gear, to the peaceful protesters dispersing... and then all hell breaking loose. First it started with the protesters shooting fireworks, and then the police started firing tear gas in response. Finally, and it seemed like everyone ran away. Then the 7/11 got looted, and suddenly it was on fire, and then more fires were set. Meanwhile I sat there cross stitching, in the safety of my home, reading all the real time comments from other viewers. It was a moment to think about how social media has changed the way news is disseminated - but that's a musing for another time.
I went to bed after that, and woke up today to the news that more people were killed, and the police shot at. More stores looted and set on fire.
Jon and I don't live anywhere near the downtown St. Louis area, so it's not a sense of real anxiety that I feel right now, but more of a worry about the general high tensions and how it negatively affects the community. Of a sadness at seeing the places that we have passed by destroyed. Of a frustration that things have come to this; that a police officer in Minnesota thought that kneeling for 8 minutes on a black man's neck was appropriate use of force despite all the other past police brutality cases. Of confusion that I am being told by some on my more left-leaning friends on Facebook that condemning the looting is racist because black people should be allowed to perpetuate the same violence and inequality that they have experienced for the past 400 years (...on other black owned stores in their community?!? I don't get it.) Of another type of confusion - where do I stand in all of this as an Asian immigrant? I feel like a temporary visitor, this is not my country, and I should not intervene, but of course I support the Black Lives Matter movement.
There are a multitude of thoughts and emotions I have surrounding this, and no clear solution to any of the negativity. It's just a lot after weeks of economic depression from coronavirus shut downs.
I went to bed after that, and woke up today to the news that more people were killed, and the police shot at. More stores looted and set on fire.
Jon and I don't live anywhere near the downtown St. Louis area, so it's not a sense of real anxiety that I feel right now, but more of a worry about the general high tensions and how it negatively affects the community. Of a sadness at seeing the places that we have passed by destroyed. Of a frustration that things have come to this; that a police officer in Minnesota thought that kneeling for 8 minutes on a black man's neck was appropriate use of force despite all the other past police brutality cases. Of confusion that I am being told by some on my more left-leaning friends on Facebook that condemning the looting is racist because black people should be allowed to perpetuate the same violence and inequality that they have experienced for the past 400 years (...on other black owned stores in their community?!? I don't get it.) Of another type of confusion - where do I stand in all of this as an Asian immigrant? I feel like a temporary visitor, this is not my country, and I should not intervene, but of course I support the Black Lives Matter movement.
There are a multitude of thoughts and emotions I have surrounding this, and no clear solution to any of the negativity. It's just a lot after weeks of economic depression from coronavirus shut downs.
No comments:
Post a Comment