Monday, February 01, 2010

For a Pessimist, I'm Pretty Optimistic

I still remember the day of your birthday. I got out of class and called to see if you were hanging around before Spanish and was told you were still having lunch. As I prepared to walk back, I got another call asking me to come over at meet you at Sainsbury Holborn. Then you asked me if I wanted to meet your friends. I froze a little because I was nervous, what if they didn't like me?

In the end I went along with you to My Old Dutch and met the 3 of them there. We talked for a short while before leaving. I remember it was cold outside and your friends slowly left. One walked with us down the block to Bloomsbury Park and took a bus from there. It was dark out, very dark. You were cold and I offered you the green plaid scarf I was wearing, that you were always fascinated with. I had on my white long gloves from H&M. I clung on to you as we walked at the side of the closed Bloomsbury Park, and down through Russell Square. We were talking, but I can't remember what about. I remember feeling really happy and excited.

Today as I looked out of the window during the same aforementioned class, seated next to a Really Hot Guy, I remembered that. I felt sad, because I remembered what I once had and now had lost. I thought about how much things had changed. And then I noticed something else, it was much more brighter now than it was at the end of November last year and the sun hadn't set yet.

Even though you are no longer around, things are no longer wreathed in darkness.

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