I have once more been visited by an odd displaced feeling again. This time it brings along many questions that I cannot help ask myself but cannot quite answer, like:

1) Why I keep avoidng every single MGS person I can faintly recognise from my level (+ the random girls in uniform I see around)
2) About myself - in relation to the concept of 'love'
3) About 'love' - in general
4) Why I find myself searching online stores everynight without fail
5) Why I have this huge compulsion to keep buying books - and then read them (5 in the last week! Enright, Katayama, Vonnegut, , Christie + almost half of Freakonomics)
6) Why I always mentally pair people in stories up (in And Then There Were None, I kept hoping Lombard and Claythrone would get together and not die in the end)
7) How I can be simultaneously rational to the point of being mechanical and robotic and irrational - then mix the two together to create a very terrifying scenario

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I have also been compiling a mental list in my head of things I want to achieve this year:

1) 41 points for IB
2) ER, gather enough confidence/self esteem to wear a bikini at the beach or equivalent
3) Get a proper wardrobe/style that suits me
4) Get around to finally buying + reading World Without End
5) Maintain my size 4 size (how the heck did I increase from size 0 to size 4 in one year?)

Oh dear, I just realised 3/5 of those aims are superficial. On the other hand, IB eats up all any vaguely intellectual brain power, so that is the main aim with the rest as mere appendices. Ho hum. I need a healthier sleep cycle.