Homesickness

Homesickness comes in 2 waves for me.

One comes in the morning when I first wake up. It comes when I open my eyes and realise I am not at home. It reminds me I am 50,000 miles from home. It reminds me I am anywhere but home and it reminds me of all the things I am currently missing right now. Things like convenience, privacy, security (both psychological and physical), family and friends which are not here for me, and that 2 months is a terribly long time to have to wait for anything and I'm so terribly impatient.

The second wave usually comes in the late afternoon, just when I return to my dorm after the day because I am tired. The feeling of tiredness does not help my mood. I have been holding back little tears all day long. They come when I am doing something that reminds me or makes me wish I was home. Things like looking at the price of tissue boxes. Things like realising I can't have ham for breakfast because it will get stolen in the fridge I put it in. I have been thinking "I wish I was home" all day long. In this time, when I am back with nothing to occupy my mind, it hits me hard.

I have just passed through the first wave today, now I am left to wonder and hope if the second wave will hit at all.