Today was a disappointing day. I left the dorm with the intention of a) setting up a bank account, b) seeing the doctor because I felt sick. I accomplished nothing. Both times I was told to come back next week. Okay the bank I can understand, but the doctor? Hello, I'll die from asthma first. I already have breathing difficulties today. I understandably left the doctors feeling rather upset. I then resolved to make the best of my situation and headed to the Shaw Library to read my text.
I went up to the library only to see a crowd of people milling about outside. Surprise! The library was closed. Thwarted for the 3rd time today. Fed up, I left LSE altogether and walked to Lincoln's Inn Field. The only bonus was that it was rather sunny today, so I found a spot under a tree and sat there to read my hist text. Then came a grasshopper. I saw it out of the corner of my right eye, advancing slowly towards me. It was a baby grasshopper, and the brightest vividest green I had ever seen. I didn't even know there were grasshoppers in UK.
Anyway because it was a baby I took pity on it. Instead of stomping on it, I picked up a stick and poked it away while saying 'go away go away' (why, I don't know). It hopped away from me and I went back to reading. Some time passed before suddenly I noted a bright green thing on my very black jacket. So I jumped up and screamed, like any (ir)rational female of my age, and it fell off. After I calmed down from the initial shock I looked about on the ground for it, but saw no sign of it.
Sufficiently startled but still trying best to be calm, I sat down again and tried to read, all while keeping a lookout for the cretin again. Then I saw it out of my left eye. Near the puddle to my left (a leaf and water filled depression in the tarmac). I eyed it suspiciously. It looked at me. It hopped closer. I jumped up from the ground and ran over and kicked it away. It fell into the puddle. It started drowning. I freaked out. I felt bad because it was a baby. It started flailing about and I started to feel traumatised. Then it righted itself. It started kicking, started swimming. HOLY SHIT IT'S A MUTANT GRASSHOPPER! I felt kind of scared. I watched it swim about for 10 minutes as people walked by, wondering if I was on some sort of experimental drugs, not taking my gaze off the florescent green thing in the puddle.
Finally after watching for a while and living in terror that it might swim to the 'shore' and come back to jump on me for revenge, I took another stick and poked it to the other side of the puddle where the 'shore' was. As I lay back satisfied that I had been a good samaritan and saved the grasshopper from certain unceremonious drowning, I noticed it now looked dead. It was on its side, legs bent a bit funny and wasn't moving. Uh oh. I finally went over and poked it one more time, righting it and it started to twitch and move its head about. It was alive!
So I quickly left the area, before it got any more funny ideas.
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